Friday, February 22, 2008

How important is sex in a relationship?

I was having this conversation with one of my best guy friends the other day. I call him Rev Kev because he’s the one I talk to when I’d like a man’s opinion with a little Holy Ghost on the side. Just keeps everything balanced, don’t it? (He’s also a very talented musician, by the way. Check out his myspace).

Anyway, so I was bitching to him about the lack of a man in my life, as I often do. He’s so kind to listen to this crap. So I ran down my ever-lengthening list of “must-haves” and one of the top entries happens to be killer sex. Problem?

Rev Kev seems to think requirements like that are exactly my problem. He says I put too much emphasis on sex.


I’m not sayin sex is the absolute most important thing in a relationship. Absolutely not. I think trust takes that slot hands down. However, good sex is pretty high on my top 10. No, mind bending sex won’t make a relationship in and of itself, no matter how good the d*ck is. But bad sex can damn sure ruin an otherwise good relationship. I’m just sayin.

After all, what is a great relationship, with open communication, wonderful chemistry, love, trust …. All that shyt, without sex? A GLORIFIED FRIENDSHIP. I’m just sayin.

(Why in the world do I even field such questions with someone who’s prone to give me such stick-in-the-mud suggestions anyway? Because my girls are liable to have me out there bad with the wanton-whore advice they pass out.)

How ya’ll feel?

-- Melyssa Ganache

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Anonymous said...

Sex is definately in the top 3 of "must have's" in a relationship! It may sound vain or shallow, but it's the truth!! You must have intimacy in a relationship, and that intimiacy has to be a 10! If you don't have great sex with your woman/man, then he or she will go elsewhere for that! There's no getting around it. A person has to be true to themselves. At the end of the day, if you don't have that physical chemistry with your mate, he or she will go elsewhere - it's just that simple. They always say the best part of an argument is the making up sex - that's so true! If i have a disagreement with my woman, i want her to be able to put something sexy on, walk past me, and make me think everything was all my fault - at least momentarily! We screw each others brains out, and forget what we even argued about. so, to answer the question of "how important is sex in a relationship" - i would have to say VERY IMPORTANT!

Melyssa Ganache said...

Top 3, annonymous? Eh. I'm thinkin trust, respect, and love of some sort. Sex is def close behind tho. You and ur woman keep "solving" your problems w sex tho, I dunno. That might not be a long term relationship and is certainly only a momentary solution, like u said. Lemme know how that works for u tho. lol. Thx for reading. :) I think u just gave me a blog topic. Make up sex. Good stuff.