Monday, June 23, 2008

Girl Play: Is she serious?

Dear Melyssa,

I guess I have two questions. First, me and my best friend have been tight since high school. Tight through her failed marriage, the births of both our kids, cheating boyfriends, changing jobs … we been through it. I love this chick. This is my ace chick. But not like that. Lately, she’s been real touchy feely with me.

We’ve always hugged hello and goodbye, kisses on the check sometimes, whatever. I never thought anything of this stuff. But what about we’re laying on the sofa the other week, on opposite ends watchin TV and she starts to give me a foot rub. Woah, right? Is it just me? I was a little uncomfortable and embarrassed, so I pretended like I was ticklish and pulled away. She just came at me more and we’re “play” wrestling on the sofa and on the floor and she’s laughing and smiling, and I was too, but just because I didn’t know what else to do. Okay, that’s one time.

Then this other time we were getting dressed at my house, bout to go to the club. I had just come out of the shower and she was already getting her dress on. So I dropped my towel and commenced to oiling up. I didn’t think anything of it. We’ve been roommates before, we’ve seen each other naked, we’ve walked in on each other having sex, we’ve actually had sex with our boyfriends in the same room before. LOL. I thought nothing of it. But something about the way I caught her peepin me in the mirror freaked me out and I finished dressing in the walk-in closet, pretending like I was looking for something to wear.

First of all, I’m straight as a fucking arrow and love the dick. But I also love this chick like a sister and don’t want to offend her. How can I bring this issue to her without ruining everything and creeping us both out? Is this even something we need to talk about? Am I being sensitive?

-- Strickly Dickly

Dear Strickly Dickly,

First of all, me too. : ) Now that that’s outta the way, my knee jerk reaction is, your girl’s waaaaay outta line and needs to be set straight. With something like this, it shouldn’t take more than one wrinkle of your face, one strong pull away of your arm, or a firmly stated, “stop it” to end all this shyt. She’s probably just as nervous about this new terrain – assuming it’s new terrain for her – as you are.

But what keeps me from going totally with that advice is the fact that you know this girl as well as you do. Yall are upper tight, been down for years, and through a few stages of life together. People don’t just have friends like that. I have two. I consider myself blessed. But thatabout it. So just off the strength of your relationship with her and you saying this behavior is brand new … I dunno. Wouldn’t you have known if she dabbled in puss? LOL. (didn’t that sound horrible? I know. Funny tho). But really, isn’t this a discussion yall woulda had by now, whether over a girl’s shopping and lunch date or a drunken confession at a late night co-ed Truth or Dare set? Homosexual proclivities don’t just pop up, as far as I know, I mean. I’d think this is something you’d already know about your girl. I dunno. Sorry I’m not being any more decisive. But you know her best.

How about this? Why don’t you ask her if she’s ever thought about being with a woman. Not like a direct interview question, but throw it in to your next girl talk/gossip session.

Y’know, “I hear Jada and Will both get it in on the low …” or whatever.

“I don’t know if I could have my man getting dicked down on the side, I don’t give a damn how much money he makes … could you be with another woman?”

Like you’re just throwin it out there. If she’s really been looking for an “in” with all this girl play, then she’ll definitely take it. If not, then there’s your answer.

-- Mel

Just to keep it 100, and because I do love to share my biz, one of my best girlfriends and I put on quite a show for one unsuspecting and lucky-as-hell dude back in college. We discussed it before hand, picked him out special and got nice and drunk. LOL. Good times. Nothing below the belt tho. No disrespect to the GLBT community, but that shit is nasty. I don’t know how straight dudes do it but God blessem!


achoiceofweapons said...

Friends is friends and family is forever but be truthful. If she is truly concerned about her friend giving her sexual advances, she needs to look over her friends background. Her friend has probally had a few questionable friendships that she ignored cause that's her girl and she has probally been creeped out a time or nine over the years but again chose for whatever reason to ignore it. But you gotta be truthful with your friends, that you don't roll that way and that no you're not open to trying it.