Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Settling Down with a Skripper: Could you do it?

She spends her early evening grinding her scantily clad ass over the erect-beneath-sweat-pants wearing happy hour crowd. She whispers in the ears of the lonely, lovelorn and cash-carrying about all the nasty things she’d like to do to whatever gentlemen she’s escorted to the back room. She sexily contorts her body in stilettos for a living and brings her paychecks home in ones and fives. Yet, at night, she climbs in your bed and spoons with you.

He’s oiled up, muscles bulging, leaping off the stage into a crowd of horny, screaming middle aged women. Sock-laden penis swinging as the baby boomers wave dollars in the air and raise their phones to snap cell flicks of your man simulating oral sex on someone’s mother, sprawled out, legs spread on the floor. He flips her over, to an uproarious reaction from the sex-starved crowd, slams his sock against her ass a few times, licking his lips before his set is over. Then, he wipes down, gets dressed, and lets himself into your apartment with a key.

How the fuck does that work?

I mean, I’m a pretty open minded person, but I don’t understand how simulated sex to music, outside an otherwise monogamous relationship is ok. I don't care if you are gettin paid and bringin home the cash. Maybe I’m just being judgmental.

I recently met a man who pays his mortgage pretending to fulfill the fantasies of women. He’s an exotic dancer named Chocolate. (aren't they all). But this dude is every bit as delectable as his name sounds. I imagine, I mean. Haven’t been there yet, but we’ll see.

I’m a little put off by his work, quite frankly. Though everything else about him is starkly domesticated. He cooks, does laundry and even has full custody of his 12-year-old son. I know, right! He’s grounded, well read and professes to be monogamous-minded. I spent some time with him and must admit, I went home impressed.

But I cannot reconcile the reality he’s shown me, with my own wild imagination. In my mind I see him constantly being approached by horny college co-eds, out for a drunken night of debauchery; propositioned by old sugar mamas looking to put some cash in his pocket after hours … I see him actually becoming aroused by his own titillating performance and being tempted to head out to the parking lot and make it real. I've definitely been to a few of these lil hedonistic shindigs and definitely tried to entice one of the professionals into following me home and he was definitely wit it. I know how this goes down. :)

I dunno, I’d like to give dude a chance, but I don’t think I can even go. Maybe he’s not real relationship material, but perhaps I can keep him around anyway. If that nigga can move like that on the stage …. Lawd. : )

What do you guys think? Could you wife up or settle down with an exotic dancer?

Hit up the survey to the right please and thank ya.

-- Mel


Trin-Trin said...

i can be open-minded but it truly depended on his personality more than anything...i wouldnt say no immediately, but i wouldnt say yes immediately either...i'd have to see how it played out

Melyssa Ganache said...

Yeah, I guess you're right, Trin-Trin. Based on everything else, he seems like a pretty stand-up dude. Certainly a few steps up from another guy I once dated who happened to be a former model with aspirations of stripping. Nigga had the nerve to tell me that gay strippers get paid way more than men who dance for chicks, and that he was considering it. "I mean, it wouldn't mean anything, it would just be about the money." Wow. It was a wrap.

I'm like a homosexual and married man magnet. I think I'll write a blog.

MissStarKitty said...

Well I've been the exotic dancer that's also been the girlfriend with her head on straight too. I went to "work" made my money (honestly mind you, no extras) and then I had my outside life, 2nd job, paying for college, had my own car, apartment, and for a while I was single, I tried dating and I honestly have to say it takes a secure person, and a very open minded person to be in a relationship with a person whose money comes from the adult entertainment industry. I dated a guy for a while who frequented gentlemen and strip clubs like his life depended on it, but couldn't deal with the fact that I worked at the very place he used to frequent, or that I never asked him for money. I eventually ended up in a relationship with the bouncer of the club, he is also the father of my children, so is it possible to settle down with a stripper, yes, but when you decide to have a family with a stripper or become serious with a stripper I definitely believe that some things should change.

Mista Jaycee said...

Hey Mel,
I do see ya point but just think about it how is it different from dating an actor?
He plays a role, it's not really that different from a young hot actor who plays down his girlfriend and appears shirtless and in various contests aimed at young women fans! Sure the Rock luvs all the ladies huh?

a single male's point of view said...

I'm to jealous of a person to be in a relationship with a stripper. Sorry!! We could be friends with benefits, but not in a serious relationship.

It all comes down to the immortal words the rapper Ludacris "I want a lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed"

I wuoldn't have any problems dating someone that USED to strip, but I can't get down with someone who is currently "doing something strange for some change"

Melyssa Ganache said...

Miss Star Kitty, Thx for your personal account. I can feel your man having a problem with you working at his fav club, tho. It's a double standard, yes, but still. If my stripper were retired, I'd definitely have no problem with his past work. It's the present I cant get past. Like you Single Male, I am far too territorial to be havin all that three and four nights a week.

You make a good point, Mista Jaycee, but fuck that. :) I can't go. I think I'd always be wondering if this move or that move was part of his routine.